Semi-Chlorinated Life: Are my kids too busy?

I love the endless opportunity our kids have, but do you ever wonder if our kids are too busy? Don't get me wrong, I am a Title IX baby and relish every opportunity available to my daughter and my son. When I was little I wanted to play soccer, but there wasn't a girls’ team, so I watched my brother. And then I found swimming, thank goodness I loved it because I am not really sure what else was out there for me to do (other than cheerleading which I learned in 9th grade was not for me).

My kids, on the other hand, can't seem to fit all their activities into a 24/7 week. I have already written a lot about about “fighting for my kids' free time” in a another blog about keeping it all together as a parent, but I feel like I am losing the fight. And frankly, maybe “fight” is too strong of a word. Maybe I am just their lobbyist or advocate. I feel like I need to picket outside their bedrooms just to remind them how cool an afternoon of make-believe and play can be . . .

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Busy Mom: Keeping it all together

I'm fairly certain schedules are crazier than they ever were for our parents, and I remind my mom of that all the time.  There are SO many more opportunities for kids, which of course is great, but a true scheduling challenge for parents.  This is where/why the term “it takes a village” is often used.  Racing around like a NYC taxi cab trying to keep up with the insane schedule that YOU have created, using what has become the most common phrase in the house, “Hurry up, we’re gonna be late!”

I know I am not alone in this.  I have an  6-(almost 7) year-old who goes to piano once a week for a half-hour, gymnastics three times a week for two hours, is just about ready to start soccer again on the weekends, and was devastated when I told her she simply had NO time to do karate.  She was clever too.  She said, “But I have Monday’s after piano and Thursdays!”  At that moment, I became the defender of her free time, her time to just chill or play outside, and I stuck to my guns. I told her something had to be dropped for her to sign up for karate, and she decided karate could wait.

I remind myself every day that my kids are young and have plenty of time for crazy schedules.  Maybe I am just overly aware of how nuts life gets in junior high and high school, due to my schedule then: four early mornings a week, getting up at 4:07 a.m., driving with my mom 40 minutes to swim practice or weights that lasted about an 1.5 hours; then I would go straight to school until 3 p.m.; after school I would hop back in a car to ride to afternoon practice, which would last for 2.5 hours.  I didn't get home until 7:15 p.m. most nights. That's 4:15 a.m. - 7:15 p.m. Monday through Thursday, an afternoon workout on Friday, and a longer 3 hour morning workout on Saturday.  So I know life can and will get even crazier.

But for now, my biggest challenge is organizing activities and making sure everyone is picked up and dropped off with as few mess-ups as possible. Enter my village.  I, like everyone else, have forgotten practices, messed up times and/or confused locations.  I feel like my mommy brain has turned into quite a trapper keeper calendar that could have been very useful to me in college, but nonetheless, is getting it’s full use now!  Mom’s are somehow able to keep their kid’s schedules all locked tight in their brain, but our own is a total loss at times.

My friends and I are so keen to the “village” needs that if anyone of calls during the end of school/busstop drop-off times, we know we must answer because it usually means that a mommy is panicing and cannot make it on time.  To which our only reply is always and simply, “Don’t worry.  We’ve got you!”  Ahhh, such sweet words.  The “village” has your back!

Here are my 7 Keys to Keeping it All Together

1. Fight for your child’s free time.
2. Write down your schedule on a dry erase board that is in a central place, like the kitchen.  More conversation takes place in the kitchen than anyother room.
3. Divide, delegate, and conquer.  Let me be the 10,000th person to tell you it's ok. You CANNOT be in two Places at once.
4. Talk to your kids about their schedule.  My kids have such better memories than me when it comes to stuff like this. Sidenote (I will often tell my kids’ what I need at a store before I walk in and then ask them before I leave the store as a checklist. They never fail!)
5. Carpool! It isn’t as complicated as it seems, especially if your carpool pals are flexible!  Establish flexibility in the beginning and don’t keep score.
6. Don’t panic if you mess up. Run through PLAN B with your kids in case you are not on time so they know what to do and where to go.
7. Play hookie every now and then.  Escape from your schedule every so often.  It feels great and your kids will LOVE it.

Brrr, It’s Cold Outside!

Are you thinking, “it’s too cold, it's March, where's spring?" Because I am right there with you. However, I am in Utah so we're a little more used to it, But still. When it is cold outside, all I really want to do is curl up in front of the fire with a warm blank, someone to snuggle, a good movie and some popcorn. However, thinking like can make winter really long and make for very bored children. Besides, it's quite rare that it’s too cold to get outside and get moving.  There will always time to come back in and enjoy that warm toasty moment after a little physical exertion.

We, as parents, have to lead the charge on this one.  If we don’t urge our kids to get outside on cold days, they won’t know what they are missing.  Honestly every time we bring it up, at least one of our two children will whine for a bit about how cold it will be. But we keep pushing forward and working to get the family suited up for the elements.  Being prepared really helps you achieve that victory. Here’s my preparedness list for heading outside when it’s cold.

1. Accessories.  Make sure you have all the necessary accessories to keep everyone warm: hats, gloves, snow pants, goggles, hand warmers…layers.
2.  Just plan to get outside. Don’t worry about what you’re going to do, just get out there even before making a concrete plan, unless of course you’re going skiing or snowshoeing. Often you’ll find more to do without a set schedule and have more fun.
3. Use the facilities. Always go to the bathroom before stepping outside and have the kiddos do the same.  If you don’t, the kids will come back in and never return because frankly it’s just too hard to get those layers on and off easily…don’t give them a chance to escape.
4.  Remember anything is possible.  There are very few “no’s” when embarking on a wintery cold outside adventure.  Take off your mommy hat and just let the kids have fun.  Safe but fun! 

Now, we move onto the plethora of possible activities, which as I stated should be discussed once outside.  When kids are in the element, they can simply see the fun. Standing in the warm house, it's tough for them to cast an educated vote.

• Sledding.  This is such a fun and easy activity that quickly turns into exercise. And the best part, you don’t need a formal sled.  We have used a laundry basket many times.  If you don’t have a big hill, create one by piling the snow up.  You will be surprised how much the kids like to mold the snow.  Snowy sandcastle anyone?! Don't have snow, slide, swing or race.
• Shoveling.  They don’t have to know it is a chore.  Some of my best workouts have involved shoveling the walk. In fact, I almost went into labor with Skye because of it.  You can make it fun by creating a contest out of it: who can collect the “Biggest Pile” of snow. Don't have snow, try racking or bagging leaves. Picking up sticks. Same concepts apply. Everything becomes more fun when it’s a contest! 
• Tag or hide and seek.  These games can last quite a while and have room for strategy and fun.
• In colder climates:
• Make a snowman or snow angels, or both. Just moving around in snow is harder on the body and therefore burns off energy. So if the snow is falling or just fell, making a snowman can be a great family activity.  And I just learned the proper way this year.  You have to start with a small snowball and roll it around in the snow, packing down the new particles of snow so that the snowball picks up as you go.  It creates the perfect ball!!! So fun! 
• Skiing, skate skiing and snowshoeing are all amazing cold weather activities but require some equipment, skill and/or extra cash.  If you have the means and the access, these are super fun family adventures that I highly recommend. 
• *Notes to remember: Always pack snacks when heading away from home for any of these activities.  The cold weather makes little kids and big kids SUPER hungry, really fast. And they tend to not feel thirsty as quickly, so be sure to take water breaks as well.

Now get out there and Have Fun…and Don’t be afraid of the cold!!!

Lessons learned from hosting my son’s birthday party

As you may remember, we decided to throw our 5-year-old’s birthday party at home this year. We ended up with 13 kids, most of them 5-year-old boys, and a temperature of -5 degrees outside.  Hmmm, that posed a problem since our party plan was to start outside with a super cool obstacle course my husband put together that included some 4X4’s, a slide, a hoop, 5 ski poles, some tennis balls and a large bucket. Use your imagination!! I am fairly certain my husband was more excited about it than the kids. 

First lesson learned: You might be more excited than the kids about the activities planned and will have to role with the punches.

Since nobody wanted to go outside when they first arrived, we dove into pillow making…huge mistake.  The energy, which exploding upon arrival, was intense. Add to that a bunch of stuffing, and we ended up with one giant fuzzball of a living room.  Plus, the kids were so excited about the party that they couldn’t really focus on the project. YIKES!  In the end though, the pillows were completed and the kids LOVED them! I also used the pillow craft as our goodie bag, killing two birds with one stone by creating an activity that would produce their own goodie bag! Yay for no candy and lots of cuddling! The only hiccup was the project was done in about 15 minutes.  Hmmm, now what do we do??? 

Second lesson: Always do something to get the wiggles out before jumping into a calm activity…and always assume your house will be trashed J

Thank goodness for Papa!  This is when I called upon my dad.  The 72-year-old man saved the day at his 5-year-old grandson’s birthday party with magic tricks!  Yes, the same magic tricks he did for my brother and I at our parties.  And he had the kids sitting still, quiet and in complete awe!  They were even cheering for more!  He used the “have you ever seen me unscrew my finger before” trick and the “ I can rub this coin into my elbow and find it in your shoe” trick.  It was beautiful!

Third lesson learned: Always have grandpa at birthday parties!

After Papa’s magically moment, the kids seem to go their separate ways.  Some went outside to brave the cold and the obstacle course…to my husbands delight!  Others went upstairs to play with air hockey and Beyblades.  In the end, the kids played, ate cake and even opened presents without chaos.  With help from my 11-year-old niece Jordan, we handed out numbers to the gift givers, and when their number was called, they got to bring their gift up to Spider (who was sitting in a chair) and stand by him while he opened it. 

Fourth lesson: Your vacuum cleaner really can make any mess disappear!

Before we knew it, our two-hour extravaganza was over and the doorbell began to ring, to everyone’s joy!

Fifth lesson learned: It’s okay to celebrate when the last child is picked up.  Birthday parties are quite the festive feats!

Happy party hosting!