Discipling your kids when they are tired

I need a little help here. There are times when I just drop the discipline all together and focus on getting my kids to bed, and then there are times, like tonight when I just cannot give in. I had to work from 2pm-7pm so we had our babysitter watching the kids. She is very good. She takes them out and plays with them. They seemed so very happy. I walked in and they continued to be happy until about 10 minutes after our babysitter left. I know they do this because it is ME. I get that. They like to do this to mom. But, I also knew that my daughter was very tired. And, understandably so. We have been on the road now since Feb 7th. We have been living in a small one bedroom hotel suite. All four of us in one room. Taking that into consideration, I knew I needed to get the kids into bed early. So I focused on getting there PJ's on. That actually went very smoothly. It seemed to go downhill when they asked me for a treat and I pulled out my jellybeans. I gave them each 3 and my daughter lost it. She wasn't happy with jellybeans as her treat and nothing seemed to please her. She was inconsolable and, you know what, I was not happy with her. Instead of sending her straight to bed, I used a very relaxed tone and gave her 2 more chances to take her jellybeans before taking them away. We then went in and tried to brush teeth and she wouldn't do it. I calmly gave her 3 chances to brush her teeth or she was going to lose sweets for all of the following day. She opted not to brush her teeth and so we went in to the bedroom. All the while, she was crying hysterically. After attempting to read to my son, who was being so very good, I gave in and listened to her request. She had been begging to brush her teeth. I didn't want to do it because I felt like she needed to understand the consequences of her actions and decisions but then I thought of how tired she was and changed my mind. We brushed teeth and then she asked for her jellybeans. I said no way and she continued to cry. She is now sleeping and I am okay with giving her another chance but welcome anyone's thoughts on this subject. Do you think an overtired kid can really make a good decision? I bet your answer is going to be yes...but would you have done the same thing as me? How about the fact that all of this was because of some damn jellybeans!!!

Rewarding the good!

I try to focus on the positive and the good in every part of my life. I feel like I give my kids some praise but I know I could be doing more. I say this because I am in a pretty tough stage of discipline. 3 1/2 year old girl and 20 month little boy. My little girl has a daily dose of meltdown and my little boy likes to hit, kick and bite. I feel like I spend 90% of my day focusing on disciplining the bad as opposed to praising the good. And they are good kids.

Lately, I am exhausted at the end of the day. Don't get me wrong, it is not just my kids but when you are tired, it makes parenting even more difficult. Often times the easy thing to do is ignore bad behavior but I have made "nipping things in the bud" a priority. The things to "nip" are manipulation and all the kicking, hitting and biting. I think I spend a good half hour sitting in time out with my son. And I am constantly negotiating with my daughter...I feel like I am Brad Pitt's agent.

When the air is cleared and they are done with their punishment, they know that I love them and we always hug and kiss but I feel I need to try a change in tactic. I want to focus a bit more on the positive. For instance, my son crawled out of his crib all by himself the other day. I was right there watching him do it. He was throwing a fit a few seconds before because he didn't want me to get him out. So I watched him struggle and struggle until finally, he was on the ground safe and sound. I was so excited for him. I clapped and cheered and all of a sudden, his grumpy face turned to complete pride. He was so proud of himself for doing it. And he changed his mood into a happy guy.

I will still discipline. I have to...it is my job. But I will, for the next while, try to focus more on giving my kids praise for even the smallest things, like eating their cereal or opening the door for our dog. They do a ton of wonderful things each day and they should hear positive words more, especially from their biggest fan.